Picture this, you have finally landed that opportunity that you have always dreamt about. It could be anything. Maybe itâs a promotion or starting your own business.
Generally, how does a person feel in such a situation? They feel proud. Right?
But you are feeling something else, a nagging voice in your head whispering, âYou donât deserve this. You are not good enough. You canât do it.â
This, my friend, is Imposter Syndrome.
Beware of itâit is a thief.
It robs you of your confidence. It robs you of your accomplishments. It robs you of your right to enjoy the success you have earned.
Donât let it win.
You can think of imposter syndrome as an inner critic. This critic does everything to drag you away from success.
Your inner critic makes you believe that you are not as competent as others think you are. It ignores your previous achievements and successes. It doesnât care, even if there is plenty of evidence proving him wrong.
You feel like a fraud. You think your success is just a result of luck or external factors. Sound familiar?
Anyone can become a victim of imposter syndrome, whether you are a student or a seasoned professional. It doesnât even spare people who have âmade itâ.
Keep in mind that you are not alone in feeling this way.
The reality behind imposter syndrome is that we place too much emphasis on external validation.
But why are we looking for external validation?
Society!
Society is constantly pushing us to compare ourselves to others. Comparison is everywhereâon social media, in our workplace, neighbourhood, or even in our social circles.
When you look at your colleagues, you may think they seem to have everything figured out. You may think, âThey are so much smarter, more talented, more deserving.â
But what you donât see is that they may be battling the same self-doubt issue as you are.
Take Maya Angelou, for example, a literary giant who has inspired millions. She also accepeted that despite writing eleven books, she still feels that she is playing a game on everybody and they may find it out.
If brilliant people like Maya Angelou can feel like an imposter, it is clear this is not about capability, it is about perception.
The first crucial step in overcoming imposter syndrome is to acknowledge your feelings.
If thoughts of self-doubt are coming, donât suppress or ignore them. If you push aside your feelings, they will not disappear on their own. They will gain more power over time.
When you start acknowledging that you are experiencing imposter feelings, you are taking an important step toward regaining control.
Pause and reflect on your feelings and thoughts of self-doubt. Ask yourself, what you are feeling right now and what triggered these thoughts.
You can journal your emotions. By journaling about your feelings of imposter syndrome, you gain clarity on when and why these emotions arise.
Once you have identified your feelings, give them a name. For example, say to yourself, âThis is imposter syndrome.â Naming the emotion helps to distance yourself from it.
Focus on your accomplishments. It will help you shift the narrative from âI donât deserve thisâ to âIâve worked for this.â
Celebrate your achievements. Recognize them. It will help you internalize your success.
When you celebrate, you remind yourself of your capabilities, skills, and the effort you have put in to reach your goals.
You can focus on your accomplishments by journaling about them. Reflect on your past goals and what process you followed. You will realize that you put in many late nights, you learned new skills, and you overcame many obstacles.
Share your wins with trusted friends, colleagues, or mentors. Talking about your accomplishments can help you see them through othersâ eyes, who will likely give you the validation you may be hesitant to give yourself.
When you experience imposter syndrome, emotions often cloud your judgement. You may feel like you are unqualified or you donât deserve your success.
But those feelings donât align with the reality of your accomplishments.
Separate your emotions from the actual facts. Ask yourself if your emotions are based on reality or just self-doubt.
When you do that you see the situation more objectively and realize that you do deserve to be where you are.
By focusing on facts, you stop giving power to your negative emotions.
Be mindful that if you give more power to your emotions, you may miss opportunities, you may hesitate, or you may self-sabotage.
When you compare, it triggers imposter syndrome.
On social media, you constantly see the best moments of others. You start having feelings that you are falling behind. You think that others are more talented and successful.
But the truth is that comparison is an illusion. It is detrimental to your mental health and self-worth.
Constantly comparing yourself to others creates a negative loop in your mind.
So keep in mind that comparison doesnât serve youâit just eats away at your confidence.
To overcome imposter syndrome, shift focus from others to yourself. You are unique. Your journey is unique. And comparing yourself with someone else wonât help you grow.
Recognize your strengths. Limit social media exposure. Appreciate others without envy.
Keep in mind that comparison is tempting, but it is not productive.
Grow in life, donât compete!
Negative self-talk will sound something like this:
âIâm not smart enough.â
âI donât deserve this.â
âI will fail and everyone will see Iâm a fraud.â
Take control of your negative self-talk as it erodes your confidence and keeps you from reaching your full potential.
The first step in challenging negative self-talk is to recognize when it is happening. Pay attention to moments of self-doubt or insecurity.
Once you recognize these negative self-talk, label them for what they are.
Then challenge the vailidity of these talks. Ask yourself, âIs this really true? Is there any evidence to support this belief?â
Next, reframe the narrative that negative self-talk is telling you.
Over time, challenging and reframing your negative self-talk will become second nature. Then, you will approach situations with greater confidence and clarity.
Imposter syndrome has the power to stop you in your tracks.
You may feel like you are not ready to take the next step, or worse, like you should not even try.
To fix this, Action is the key.
When youâre dealing with imposter syndrome, donât wait for the perfect moment. It is a trap.
You may think, âIâll take action once I feel more confidentâ or âIâll try that when I know more.â
The problem is, that feeling of certainty may never come. So take action.
When you are surrounded by doubts and still you take action, you prove to yourself that you are capable.
You challenge imposter feelings with each step forward.
Every time you complete a task, overcome a hurdle, or achieve a goalâno matter how smallâyou are proving that you can succeed.
Imposter syndrome often stems from your negative beliefs.
Beliefs, that are born when you get an opportunity for a role or project. You start thinking that you should already know everything. Or you should have mastered all the skills required for that opportunity.
Donât see knowledge gaps as flaws. Understand that gaps in knowledge are natural. Even the most experienced professionals also face it.
Donât think, âIâm not cut out for this.â Instead think, âItâs a great opportunity to learn a new skill!â This reframe can make the unknown feel exciting rather than overwhelming.
Consider tech innovators like Bill Gates or Elon Musk. They are constantly absorbing new information, reading, and adapting. If someone at their level of success is still learning, there is no reason you should feel inadequate for doing the same.
Become a lifelong learner and value constructive feedback as a tool for improvement.
Develop a growth mindset. People with a growth mindset donât see challenges or mistakes as indicators of failure but as essential steps toward improvement.
Actively seek out ways to keep learning. Take formal education or online courses if they can help. Read great books. Network with like-minded people. Or, you may simply learn by observing how others do things differently.
Ultimately, the goal is not to eliminate imposter syndrome. It will keep coming. The goal is to recognize it and donât let it overpower you.
Take the example of Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook, who has spoken openly about her imposter syndrome. She once said, âThere are still days when I wake up feeling like a fraud, not sure I should be where I am.â Yet, despite these feelings, sheâs led one of the biggest companies in the world.
Donât let imposter syndrome live in your mind rent-free.
Remind yourself repeatedly that you have worked hard to get where you are. You deserve every bit of success.
So the next time you hear that little voice questioning your worth, remember thisâyou are not an imposter. You are enough.
Own your success. Embrace your achievementsâsmall or big. And keep pushing forward.
Best of luck to you and hope you have more success!
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